The story of Salt Lake City’s Less People More Robots is a touching tale of two seemingly opposite guys meeting in an online forum and deciding to get together ... in a band.

Rusty “The Bass Player of Justice” Monson and Matt “Hammer Hands” Crane: the former, a dispensary of common sense (rare in online forums); the latter a loose-cannon flamethrower (the common field mouse of the forum world). An odd couple, sure, but so were chocolate and peanut butter once.

Monson was a semi-retired bassist and guitarist, but an avid watcher and commentator on TheRockSalt.com’s forum. Crane was a habitual shit-stirrer, with a band everybody just had to hear—if only because it simply must be a freakshow. The two became friendly and though Monson was gearless after nine years of inactivity, Crane loaned him a bass and talked him into coming over to his pad for a jam session.

After some months, they eventually suckered singer Laura “The Siren of Light” Duzett, guitarist Dave “The Sultan of Rock” Walker, and Robbie “The Drums of Thunder” Lovell into the fold. They called themselves Less People More Robots, a name Crane had used for the solo mission he ostensibly was yakking about and recorded a six-song, self-titled demo with Andy Patterson. Their July 3, 2004, debut at Todd’s Bar & Grill with Glacial and Pushing Up Daisies was packed, even for a holiday weekend. And seven more gigs and three months later, Less People More Robots managed to garner enough readers’ votes to win Best New Band honors in City Weekly’s annual SLAMMy Awards.

So how does a band emerge from the land of text and emoticons to become Salt Lake City’s new musical darlings? Hype, both the TRS “Forumcation” and Monson’s admitted proclivity for promotion, has something to do with it. But for once, it’s actually all those things bands want to believe they have and beg us to pay attention to: chemistry and good music.

Monson says it was serendipity or some other mystical faculty that brought five differently-influenced (there’s another thing bands always claim—in this case, Monson likes classic rock, Delta blues and Neil Diamond; Duzett has a folksy side; Crane digs angular noise rock a la the Refused; Lovell’s hardcore; Walker digs electronica; they all love the Pixies) people at once to gel such as they do. “It has all happened so fast,” he says, without a trace of who’da-thunk-it cheese. Then he follows it up saying he doesn’t think the music would work without these same people.

You wanna say, “Sure, buddy,” if only to play the jaded skeptic, but actually hearing Less People More Robots (which you can do for yourself at MySpace.com/LessPeopleMoreRobots) somehow neutralizes the urge, makes you believe a little in happenstance as applied to rock music and rock bands—like you once might have before bands became career-oriented commodities instead of enchanted superheroes. Here’s why:

Those sundry influences actually play into LMPR’s hook-and-dagger rock & roll. It’s uncomplicated and tensely joyful—as serious as it is fun. “Do Bad” makes you want to stand on your couch and air guitar while simultaneously pondering why you always screw up, and sexy—Duzett’s vocals meld Kim Deal spunk to Sarah Shannon mellifluousness to Marianne Faithfull darkness, and her lyrics are candid and poetic. Crane’s and Walker’s guitars are respectively intense and ambient; Lovell’s backbeat is forceful, yet focused; Monson’s bass is pulsating. It’s chocolate, peanut butter and heroin—tasty and addictive.

Of course, let’s not get out of hand and say that Less People More Robots are the new Pixies, the new whatever. They’re simply the “goodest” thing that’s come across this writer’s local-music inbox in a while, and damn worthy of being called the Best New Band in Salt Lake City. Good call, people.

LESS PEOPLE MORE ROBOTS Todd’s Bar & Grill 1051 S. 300 West Friday, Sept. 17 9:30 p.m. 328-8650